by Ann Reavey, School Counselor

Photo by Charles Deluvio on Unsplash

My home is usually a place that restores my energy and fills my soul, a place to recover from the demands of the day. Now it’s a place where those demands pitch a tent. My erstwhile sanctuary is filled with work meetings, online classes, school projects, and a kitchen that constantly accumulates coffee cups and dirty dishes. 

I’m far from alone in this. Many of you are living in your work while parenting or parenting while living in your work, or some chaotic situation like this. Possibly your work right now consists of being in a queue on a phone line trying to access unemployment benefits. Or filling out forms for small business relief. Or wondering how to continue caring for an elderly loved one – all of this as you parent your young children and tweens.

The protective line between work and home, professional and personal, has crumbled, resulting in constant tension. Is this a workplace now, or the family kitchen table? At any given moment, I need to be a parent, learning support, or working professional. Switching gears like this is sure to raise our cortisol levels and keep them elevated.

There are a crushing number of big, heavy reasons to feel overwhelmed, and this home invasion by school and work has created a situation where it’s hard to escape from the stress.  There is a layer of burnout and fatigue that is a struggle to peel away.

Noticing and sitting with these uncomfortable feelings is important. Be present with these emotions, look at them head-on with courage. Then find what you can do to address even just a small piece of this stress productively. 

First, read this advice from Lisa W. Coyne, Ph.D.: Dear Parents: You Aren’t Perfect & That’s Just Fine . This is really the best advice that’s out there! Do what you can. Love your kids. Ask your child to do what they can with connected learning. Care for yourself. Ignore the many lists of how to be the best pandemic parent/worker/spouse. Breathe. Connect and engage. Repeat.

If you would like more resources, check out the links below that address your current needs. Remember, use what you can and disregard the rest. This is not intended to pile on more stress and obligation.

Websites and Quick Reads

Podcasts

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